Escape Reality

fair thee well

Words are free. Talk is cheap. Only actions matter to me. I try to ignore, I don’t care to see. I refuse to watch her abandoning me. Taking my heart, piece at a time. Without any warning, reason or rhyme.

dylan6111

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18 responses to “fair thee well”

      • A combination is better than a lonely one to stew over. Since I got divorced after a 4-year marriage which ended in 98, I was always reticent to settle down or even have a long-term relationship. I’ve had a couple, but I don’t think it’s for me – or for them! Haha May be living life sober will give me a new perspective and an urge to get back in the saddle again. Dunno.
        When did your last one end and why is it killing you apart from being your most recent?

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      • I got divorced in 95. Been through a few since. Then stayed alone for probably 10 years. About a year ago I started up with an old friend from years ago who was my friends girlfriend back then. Everything good until a month ago. Like a vicious cycle it starts up again. I am still trying to work it out but it makes me want to drink a fifth of Scotch and that’s not good. I thought after all the years alone it would be different. I love her madly. That is what is killing me. Sad tail. Staying stubborn!

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      • Gee, ‘been through a few since’ haha. I needed a chuckle. I’m sorry to read what happened to you with your latest gf.
        I never drank hard Licor like Scotch, mainly regular beer or light beer like Millers. But I would down at least 24 cans a day for months on end.
        I have a date with a girl this morning. My first date in at least a year. I still don’t know if I’m doing the right thing by dating and such. I have no money lol. All of my money goes into child maintenance and my kids’ sport pursuits and feeding them on weekends and transport. Paying bills, savings – the list is endless. My point being, if I did find someone, I couldn’t swoon them. And ladies like a bit of swooning. Even today’s date had to be downgraded from Lunch to just Coffee because frankly my budget (this fortnight) doesn’t allow me to buy a girl lunch. So, I might have jumped the gun trying to get back into the saddle.
        Sh/t happens.
        I love that ‘staying stubborn’ meme.

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      • Yeah it’s getting crazy again. Seems to me everything is great for about a year. Then something happens and things change. All my money goes to everybody but me lol. I may have made a mistake starting it up with her. It was hard not to. For now I am just am hurting. One thing about getting old is I’ve been through this many times before. I just need to stay stubborn lol. If I were you I’d probably still pursue that girl. I am a romantic at heart. Don’t know why but I still believe in love.

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      • I know the frustrations about the money situation. I just came back from that ‘date’. Nothing to see here. Let’s just leave it at that lol
        Since you have been through these tough times a lot you should be very resilient and stubborn.
        No, I don’t believe I will be seeing that lady again and that’s a good thing. There is another lady I’m chatting to and I hope to tee something up with her shortly.

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      • That’s alright about the first one. I believe the next one will be better. I will never learn. I will try again after some time. Luckily I’ve learned and remembered from past disasters and victories. Some parts of growing old are good lol. I have been pretty calm tonight. Though my Son is been calling and hinting around. The money thing

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      • ‘I will try again after some time’:
        Charles Bukowski epitaph – ‘Don’t Try’

        Yeh, I’m starting to think I’m only up for friendship. Like, companionship for a coffee, brunch, jog or a hit of tennis yeh? I believe I don’t have time or money for a relationship. And that’s ok.

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      • It is okay. After so long alone and this last year I may be best suited for that also. Then I get up this morning. Text on my phone. Starts up again. Being alone not this hard for sure

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      • Sorry that previous message got sent out prematurely by a finger fade.
        Bukowski further said:
        Somebody asked me: “What do you do? How do you write, create?” You don’t, I told them. You don’t try. That’s very important: not to try, either for Cadillacs, creation or immortality. You wait, and if nothing happens, you wait some more. It’s like a bug high on the wall. You wait for it to come to you. When it gets close enough you reach out, slap out and kill it. Or if you like its looks, you make a pet out of it.’
        I love that quote.

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      • That is a great quote. That is a so true. Don’t know why but it reminds me of Dylan’s Standing in the doorway…” don’t know if I saw you if I would kiss you or kill you ” …just let it happen I guess. I have no clue how or why. Just never stop.

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      • That’s a fantastic connection you made between Bukowski’s poem and Dylan’s Standing…’If I would kiss you or kill you’. I gather Bukowski was referring more to the creative process, but I can see how it may be relatable to what Dylan was on about. One of my favs from ‘Time Out of Mind’.

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      • Reminded me of it. That line drifts into my brain often. Loved the poem. ‘Time Out of Mind’ was the soundtrack of my divorce. I think I listened to just that for a year. Painful times…

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